Women wonder why us men have so much fun sometimes. I think this is a good example of this.
Tom: I am a worthless human being
Me: why?
Me: lol
Me: ha ha
Me: HA HA
Me: you are good
Tom: You laugh at my misfortune?
Me: you should do stand up
Tom: I do that everytime I go to take a piss
Tom: Don’t you? or are you a WOMAN?!
Tom: you piss like a WOMAN?!
Me: yea
Me: my dick is too big to stand up
Me: the pain to hold is too much for one man
Tom: I’ve gotten used to the chaffing and callouses from it dragging on the ground behind me…
Me: i roll mine up
Me: it takes me 20 minutes, but it’s worth it
Tom: I can’t do that with mine.. you know how when you roll a hose, the roll gets bigger and bigger? well, yeah, it’s 8inches across, so that roll gets pretty big pretty quick…
Me: i got a car follow me.. i put it in the hummer limo
Tom: Yeah? I have to drive a big semi with two 43 foot trailers just to hold it.. you know.. the kind they use to transport aircraft parts…
Me: pfft
Me: that’s nothing
Me: i used the aircraft itself
Tom: one time, I was trying to turn around, and I jacknifed it and the end of my dick fell off the second trailer and crushed thirteen vehicles and several small houses.
Me: you know the WTC..
Me: that was my dick
Tom: mhm
Tom: wow
Tom: someone blew up your dick?
Me: naw
Tom: I was gunna say, “sux 2 be u”
Me: damn I LOST
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